Nineties Kids

Erin J. Bauman | Contributor

(Getty Images)

Here’s to the kids

who never put down their skateboards.

Despite fresh grey in their sideburns

they still deem four wheels on a plank—

sans helmet and pads, of course—

a more than acceptable way to travel;

to and from work,

to the grocery store,

or anywhere else most adults

would take a car.


Here’s to the kids

who still blast


to pump themselves up

before a big board room meeting.

Who hide concert t-shirts

under suits and ties

like some kind of undercover

rock n’ roll hero.


Here’s to the kids

drinking pennyroyal tea

on a plane

in utero,

and here’s to Dave Grohl

for carrying on

without Kurt.


Here’s to the kids

who are becoming moms and dads

that are tattooed

and pierced,

and have hair that is too long

or too bleached.

A far cry

from the poofy bouffant do’s and polo shirts

their own parents put on

to be parents.


Here’s to the kids

who run small backwoods farms,

and eat sumptuous concoctions

of roots and tubers

that they have harvested by hand.

The ones who install solar panels

on their roofs

in an effort to live sustainably,

and as a bonus,

wave a finger at big business

in the process.


Here’s to “Wayne’s World”

and “Stuart Smalley,”

“It’s Pat,”

“Deep thoughts,”

and everything else

that decade of “SNL” churned out

for our entertainment.

RIP Chris Farley, forever.


Here’s to the nineties,

and to the kids from it

who aren’t buying into the reality

that capitalism has created for us.

The kids who are becoming adults

who still don’t believe in nine-to-five,

or bottom lines that lack heart,

or food that isn’t food;

who have long hair,

regardless of their gender—

that comes in three colors;

who still wear short-shorts at 32—

the kind with front pockets that hang out the bottom

because they still have the legs for it.

Here’s to the kids

who will never put down their skateboards!